My Language to Yours

Friday, November 9, 2018

Friends are Forever

So, the other evenin', I found out that I'd lost a very good classmate friend from back home. I also found out that a very dear friend from back home, that could've been my sister, has cancer. Then, I hit a deer. They say things come in 3s.

But, no one can prepare you for the loss you feel when you find out that somethin' so addictive couldn't let go of someone you love, or vice versa. I know not the real reasons that after 7 months in rehab my gal pal couldn't handle goin' back to the life she needed to grasp and get through. But, I know it wasn't easy for her. Yes, there are no excuses, and we should be in control. But, I've been there. Though I've never done drugs, I've felt the abandonment by a lover she'd known while havin' to rear her tot alone. I know that much of us, even me, had let her down in bein' her support system, upset and taken aback by the fact it seemed she's usin' us for our money or whatever handouts she could get. I feel the guilt of the detachment from her now. What more could I've done to still keep my hand reached out to help guide her and help her up?

3 classmates we've lost this year. 5 last year, and consecutively every year since our graduation 21 years ago. It's so sad how the tally keeps risin'. Whatever takes hold of some of us, or even the deaths that seem to have no cause except some simple wrong-place-wrong-time scenario.

But, one thing is clear to me. We can't leave our "family" to make it in this cold, dark world alone. We must surround them with a love that can build walls 'round that which they need guarded from. We must be the ever present help they need.

It's easier said than done. But, if we can take the negative feelings out of the equation and feel, instead, how our Creator would have us by lovin' our neighbor as ourselves, I think we'd have a lot less circumstantial issues plaguin' this Earth we live on.

As for those we love who've been bound with a terminal illness, we can't choose to back away and fade out of their life. The same, as above, should take precedence. They need us through their difficult journey..the highs and lows of the dreadful wish to just pass on from the aches and ills they live with every day or their perseverance to keep fightin'. We must hold them up, pray for them without ceasin', care for them as we desire to be.

I have regret that I've fallen away from a once very good friendship with my now friend strugglin' to find a way for the procedure she faces to, hopefully, rid herself of this cancer before it's too late. Though, I've reached out and promise to remain true to our vows of friendship so long ago, it's difficult to know the road she's trudgin' along at this point. I can't be there to help her as I'd wish, but I can offer encouragement and support her through sharin' her fight with others in the hopes they'll join in by also raisin' funds for the fight of her life..or, to those still close in proximity to her hopin' they'll help lighten her load as she still tries to care for her lovely family.

My heart aches for them. It aches 'cause I should've been who they could turn to when they needed it most. It aches 'cause I can do nothin' much for my friend but be here 'til she's free from all this.

But, I'm reminded that we can't stop in our tracks and give up on those we love just 'cause it'll be hard on us, too. We must remain strong, also. Remindin' them of their own strength and bein' faithul to keep the light lit for them to see the reason they're still enough. A smile can go a long way. A "How're you doin'?" can allow them to feel you care. A "Can I do anything for you?" can help brighten their dreary day.

You get the point. We can't give up on our friends and must keep them knowledgable of our love for them, no matter what they face. I urge you to reach out to those you love who are in need today, It doesn't matter what they're facin', turn a blind eye and the other cheek to those walkin' a negative lifestyle. At least, you know you've tried. Be that confidant, an accountability partner for those facin' a storm that sucks them in over and over. Stand and stay beside those facin' insurmountable odds.

We can plant a seed in their world of faith, of strength, of hope, and of love. We can be their help in times of great need.

So, whether they rebuke or want you to be there for them in the ways they want, 'cause they're in want of somethin' that's bound to take their life away...or whether they appreciate us bein' that stronghold who'll never leave them to die, we must try our best to bring them out of those dark shadows consumin' them.

As for the deer, I made sure the trooper that stopped to help me would assure that a local Native American tribe was enroute to gather it for their meat source.

We must do good, thinkin' of others and less for ourselves. Please, just go out into this world with the grace God has given to us for lovin' one another.

Here's a song of how we should see those 'round us we need to help. And I know y'all military/government/enforcement folks, especially, totally get this. ;-) Let's build our shelters, together.

Copyright November 9th, 2018 owned by C.L. Chapps


  1. Very wise advice in a world in which so many of our young people are struggling to make sense of things.

    1. Thank you, Jay. It's a difficult world to navigate, especially as a young adult. Thankfully, we've some age on us.